'Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me' at least that's what we are taught at school, but somewhere along the way we forget to pay attention and observe what that really requires from each of us.
Over my life words have hurt me and sometimes they still do, this is often when I've trusted people's words but have then observed that their actions have not mirrored them. When people say one thing and then do another it stirs feelings of isolation for me. Extending trust to someone requires a level of vulnerability and when that trust is violated it always leaves me feeling a sense of shame, that I was stupid to be so trusting, and I'm left with a view that, perhaps, the only person I should trust is myself.
But as human beings we all seek connection and isolating yourself from people because they could hurt you doesn't help with building that connection, and usually leaves us feeling much worse.
Words are so incredibly powerful, they are used to make promises, share your dreams and express the deepest of thoughts. Words give meaning, they inspire and give hope. Words shape our reality and therefore we must honour our words.
Spitting before tasting...
I've been careless with words in the past and have, at times, not appreciated the impact they have on others. I've spat out words without tasting them first and I know first-hand the devastating impact they can have.
As I continue on this life journey, of personal growth, I am more aware now than ever before of the need to honour words and I don't take that responsibility lightly.
To use words with integrity I recognised that I also needed to be congruent in the use of those words for myself. How could I tell others I loved them if I couldn't feel that true love for myself. Whilst I might think I could, the reality would be that it would be an imagined feeling and no doubt inconsistencies would appear in my actions with others. Until I truly understood what loving myself felt like, unconditional and limitless, I couldn't in all honesty use those words with others and know how to honour them.
I'm focusing on raising my words and ensuring congruence with my actions. I don't wish to hurt others with my words nor have them feel any shame for trusting me with theirs. I'll endeavour to taste the words I use regularly so I don't use them carelessly and I choose to forgive others if they do.
How will you raise your words today?